R.S. McCain Needs a New Hobby

He’s got way too much free time on his hands.

Where to start? Here, I guess:

“Hopefully, we can make an impact,” said Ms. Kenkare, as she approached a house armed with a stack of pledges and the aim of helping Mr. Obama win the votes he needs to pass his record $3.6 trillion budget.

Yep, they’re still campaigning. Obamaniacs are going door to door at The One’s behest, ginning up support for his “economic” “policies.”

So. What to do when an Obamaton shows up at your door? The money, according to blogmentor Robert Stacy McCain:

Remember your Prime Objectives. Your objectives are (a) to waste the maximum amount of the Obamanoid volunteer’s time, and (b) to ensure that, when they eventually leave, they are as demoralized as possible.

It does sound like fun. And, I’m betting, based on the environmentalists and Democrats who’ve come to my door in the past year (despite the McCain/Palin sign proudly displayed in my front yard), it would probably work.

The problem: my time is valuable, too, and I don’t want to spend it whatching some damn hippie track dirt and bugs and loose bits of hemp through my house while I’m trying to waste his time and demoralize him.

There’s a faster way. I’ve gone door to door myself, and I can tell you: very few things demoralize faster than a pair of rolled eyes, an exasperated sigh, a muttered “get a life,” and a solidly slammed front door.

And then I can get back to my cocoa, or cartoons, or…oh, taking care of the kids. Whatever.

I will admit, though: I very fondly remember the one time I did engage. It was the aforementioned environmentalists. Two of them, seeking signatures on a petition demanding more alternative energy. The leader – I assume because his hair was longer – went into his spiel about why we need to get away from oil and natural gas and, especially, coal. How we can keep supplying ourselves with energy without those ruinous products.

I didn’t intend to say it. It just slipped out. “So, more nukes, then?”

They had no idea what to say.

I guess the Rush Limbaugh story has run its course now?

There’s a new target in town. And his name…

Go back into hiding, GOP begs Dick Cheney

Congressional Republicans are telling Dick Cheney to go back to his undisclosed location and leave them alone to rebuild the Republican Party without his input.

Displeased with the former vice-president’s recent media appearances, Republican lawmakers say he’s hurting GOP efforts to reinvent itself after back-to-back electoral drubbings.

The story quotes Rep. John Duncan Jr. (R-Tenn.) and some courageous soul who wanted to remain anonymous.

Way to give the media another “Republican Civil War” storyline, guys.

In case you ever get the idea that the people who work at the federal government’s highest levels are really geniuses or something…

…read this Politico story on that “reset” button. Blame for the embarrassing mess is being laid at the feet of Hillary Clinton aide Phillippe Reines.

The error appalled some in the State Department, because the button – which was inscribed in Latin script, not Cyrillic – hadn’t been assembled with the help of State’s cadre of Russian speakers and professional translators, but rather by Clinton’s small political team. The day of the event, people involved said, Reines showed the finished product to officials who spoke Russian, but who weren’t native, or up-to-date enough to catch the error in a word out of computer terminology.

Y’know, I’m not “native, or up-to-date enough to catch” something out of computer technology. But it only took me ten minutes to figure it out.

Here’s my favorite part of the story:

Pressed Monday on the button incident, Reines denied that he’d ever blamed McFaul, and sent over a joking statement taking responsibility for the gaffe.

“Ultimotely [sic], this was my soul [sic] risponsibility [sic], nobody else’s in or out of the building. While the Russians laughed off the error and accepted the gift in the spirit of cooperation that it was meant, I’ve been sic [sic] about the mistake since, especially that I let down the Secretary and the fine professionals at the State Department,” he e-mailed.

What a pro! And he’s helping to steer foreign policy with places like Russia, and Iran, and Venezuela, and China!

I feel so very well served!

Willis, Heming, Ford, Flockhart, and Moore. Demi Moore, not that rotund liberal guy

One of these things is not like the other:

That’s Bruce Willis (I’m a big fan) and his new wife Emma Heming. Yeah, the model. He’s 54, she’s 30 (age ratio: 1.8).

Willis, you will recall, has three children with former wife Demi Moore. That means he went from this:

To this:

I simply can not tell you how much respect and admiration I have for this man.

By the way, that’s Ashton Kutcher in the picture with Demi Moore. She’s 45, he’s 31 (age ratio: 0.69). They’re married, and were both invited to – and attended – the Willis-Heming wedding. I find it both wonderful that they can get along so well, and a little uncomfortable that they get along so well.

What’s it all mean? Willis and Moore’s oldest daughter has a step-father who’s 11 years older than she is, and a step-mother who’s 10 years older and will make her invisible to any boy she brings home. Ever.

Of course, Mom might have done that, too.

Kutcher, by the way, was recently tweeting marriage advice. Check it out.

Now. One of these things is not like the other:

That’s Han Solo, who’s 66 now, and his new fiancee Calista Flockhart, 44 (age ratio: 1.5). Ford “was thought to be marriage-leary [sic] after his divorce from writer Melissa Mathison cost him $85 million.” Yet he’s engaged again. Now that’s courage.

And one more thing: “When 66 years of age you reach, fill out a t-shirt like this you will not, hmmm?”

Just a little Rule 5 action…for the ladies.

Yesterday, I recommended that Hugo Chavez kiss my ass…

…because he called President Obama “ignorant.” Like a third-world tin-hat strongman like him could ever compare with any of the top ten thousand potential U.S. Presidents.

(Side note: is it “tin-hat?” Or “tin-pot?” I’m not sure at this moment, and I’d rather have this mildly amusing side note than take the 5 seconds I’d need to google it.)

Anyway, today I see this:

U.S. Seeks Expanded Power to Seize Firms

The Obama administration is considering asking Congress to give the Treasury secretary unprecedented powers to initiate the seizure of non-bank financial companies, such as large insurers, investment firms and hedge funds, whose collapse would damage the broader economy, according to an administration document.

And I thought of this:

Venezuela government seizes ports

CARACAS, Venezuela – Venezuela’s federal government seized seaports and airstrips in at least four states on Saturday, a move critics say is meant to limit the powers of mayors and governors opposed to President Hugo Chavez.

The takeover, ordered by Venezuela’s socialist president last weekend and approved by lawmakers, aims to bring the country’s major transportation hubs under federal control this year.

There are some pretty obvious differences between what Chavez is doing and what Obama is proposing – or, rather, “considering” proposing. For one, our military won’t just move into New York and occupy a building.

But there are some pretty obvious similarities, too.

Turtles Can’t Dance

At least, not when you insist on watching them.

New column at FoxPolitics.net today, which really only touches on the whole “dancing turtle” question. It’s actually about Joe Biden. Quick excerpt:

Remember when Joe Biden was the idiot? On the campaign trail 2008, now-V.P. Joe Biden was a never-ending trove of unscripted gaffes. He called the word “jobs” a three-letter word. He said Hillary Clinton would have been the better Veep pick. He asked a man in a wheelchair to please stand up.

Post-election, it was more of the same. He took a petty dig at SCOTUS Chief Justice Roberts. He was caught on Oprah (thanks to his wife) having told a fib. He dropped an obscenity into an open mike. On the CBS Early Show, he said he was embarrassed not to know the stimulus website’s “number.”

…The question now is: how long until the Obama administration brings him back as the safer, more reliable alternative to Obama himself?

Go read the whole thing.