Just in case you’re having trouble keeping up with the Carrie Prejean/Tami Farrell Miss California thing…

…let’s meet the cast!

Carrie Prejean: the now-former Miss California, who missed out on being Miss USA by this much after telling an openly gay pageant judge that she believes in traditional marriage.

She was stripped (no pun, I swear!) of her title this week: she says it’s because of the moral stand she took; Miss California officials say it’s because she wasn’t upholding her contract.

Tami Farrell: the new Miss California. Runner-up to Prejean, taking over the role now that Prejean is out. She may hold the same beliefs as Prejean.

One does wonder whether Miss California officials are holding their breath, hoping there aren’t any more shoes to drop.

Shanna Moakler: former Miss New York and Miss USA, also Playmate of the Month in December of 2001 and co-director of the Miss California USA pageant.

She left that latter position over her disagreement with Prejean’s beliefs, but now would be willing to return.

Other characters: Miss USA CEO Donald Trump; Miss California USA executive director Keith Lewis; Charles LiMandri, Prejean’s lawyer. Pictures available, probably, but who cares?

And finally, Alexandra Wehrley: Miss Wisconsin USA, from Pewaukee. She’s not involved in any of the above drama. She’s just way better-looking than any of the other three, so I figured a few pictures were entirely called for.

There you have it, folks. You are now up to speed.