Christina Hendricks?

Best-looking woman in America?

Christina Hendricks has been named America’s best-looking woman in an Esquire cover article, but there’s more than meets the eye with this one.

…Hendricks nabbed 30 percent of the votes that were cast, beating out the likes of Megan Fox, who got 14 percent of the votes, and Victoria’s Secret model Adriana Lima, who got 17 percent. Fox was last year’s title-holder in Esquire’s annual issue dedicated to the fairer sex.

If Christina Hendricks is the best looking woman in America, then that title is can be had by any redhead with a push-up bra.

Look, I’m not trying to be confrontational about this. I’m not saying Christina Hendricks is ugly. And I’m not about to suggest that Megan Fox necessarily deserves the title, either (is it just me, or is she looking more and more plastic all the time?), but…Christina Hendricks?

Why? Because she’s found a way to squeeze more silicone over the top of her dress than anybody else?

It’s a scandal, is what it is. I’ll bet eight guys out of ten couldn’t even pick her face out of a lineup. If she was buttoned all the way up, you’d have no idea. Most of you are probably thinking to yourselves: red hair? Is Trog saying that Christina has red hair?

And plus, sure, Christina Hendricks has been good for a few hundred hits these last couple of days, but that’ll fade once she’s out of the news for a while. Hayden Panettiere, on the other hand: she’s been topping my random hit meter for a long time.

Hayden Panettiere, ladies and gentlemen. Best-looking woman in America.

UPDATE - wait…what?

For starters, though the article appears in a men’s magazine, the fiery “Mad Men” star won the best-looking title via a poll of over 10,000 women.

Women voted Hendricks in? Why do I find that a little hard to believe?

UPDATE II - Here’s the full survey results. A lot of interesting stuff. A lot of interesting stuff that you may not want your spouse reading over your shoulder (or maybe you do), but for sure you don’t want your kids reading over your shoulder.

Clearly, this was a multiple-choice survey. And strangely, under the part about the “best-looking woman,” they have a link titled “Visual evidence of why Christina Hendricks gets so much support.”

Go ahead. Click. And then ask yourselves why that would cause 3,000 women to pick her.

Just what kind of magazine is Esquire, by the way?