The next great scare: Global Magnetic Shift
This sounds like a great reason to invest in interplanetary colonization:
An airport in Tampa, Florida, has had to temporarily close its runways to keep up with Earth’s magnetic north pole, which is drifting toward Russia at a rate of 40 miles per year.
Wh…what? Oh my god! Turn off that cell phone! You’re damaging the Earth’s magnetic poles!
“The Earth’s poles are changing constantly…”
They are?
“…and when they change more than three degrees, that can affect runway numbering,” FAA spokesperson Kathleen Bergen told Fox News. It’s unclear whether any other airports will have to adjust their runways.
I dunno how we’ve managed to survive here this long, honestly.
Earth’s magnetic field, which still flummoxes those who study it, “is thought to be generated deep inside the planet,” LiveScience writer Jeanna Bryner explains. “An inner core of solid iron is surrounded by an outer core of molten iron. They rotate at different rates, and the interaction between the regions creates what scientists call a ‘hydromagnetic dynamo.’ It’s something like an electric motor, and it generates a magnetic field akin to a giant bar magnet.”
An electric motor. Well, at least it’s green.
Sometimes, the poles completely flip — and presumably when that happens, many bigger changes are afoot than modest tweaks to airport signs. The last time the planet experienced a polarity flip was 780,000 years ago.
780,000 years ago? Does that mean we’re due?
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Yeah, this one’s real – it’s one way in which how they established that tectonic plates were more than theoretical – BUT:
1) there’s no way at all that man can make it happen, and
2) there’s no way man can stop it.
Hard to make an eco-cause out of this one.
Yeah, that’ll stop ‘em.
It might not stop them – the eco-tards ARE inventive little squids – but it’s that much easier to ridicule.