Your government: clueless, but here to help!

Many of you are probably shocked that we at The Trog have yet to mention Zombie Preparedness Month – this month. May.

If so, you shouldn’t be. My philosophy has always been: zombie preparedness is an everyday process. There’s a word for people who wait until a particular month to check up on their zombie preparedness, and that word is: food.

Regardless, here: May is Zombie Preparedness Month, and today’s TrogloTip: do not wait around for the federal government to help you.

As proof, I present the CDC:

“If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (including isolation and quarantine). It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated.”

How to “break the cycle of transmission?” How “patients” can “best be treated?” Haven’t these people ever seen a movie?

There’s a word for those who don’t keep up their zombie preparedness, and there’s a word for those who think the CDC is on to something. And it’s the same word.

Via Insty.

Note: the CDC website isn’t responding, so both links lead to Insty. I’ll fix it later if it starts working again.

UPDATE - it finally loaded. I wonder if Instapundit’s link crashed a server or something? If so, you might want to wait a couple days to try it. I mean, an Instapundit link and a TrogloPundit link?