Lower your expectations, and you’ll never be disappointed. No, I’m not talking about this blog.

I know you were thinking it. So stop. Stop!

This is what I’m talking about. Over at Conservative Compendium, Brian Garst promotes A Petition After His Own Heart:

The online petition portal of the Obama White House allows users to submit and sign petitions. Those that acquire 25,000 signatures within a certain period of time then receive an official response from the administration. One such petition is actually an amusing commentary on the petition process itself.

Here it is:

We demand a vapid, condescending, meaningless, politically safe response to this petition.

Since these petitions are ignored apart from an occasional patronizing and inane political statement amounting to nothing more than a condescending pat on the head, we the signers would enjoy having the illusion of success. Since no other outcome to this process seems possible, we demand that the White House immediately assign a junior staffer to compose a tame and vapid response to this petition, and never attempt to take any meaningful action on this or any other issue. We would also like a cookie.

I think maybe they overstepped themselves by asking for the cookie, but what the hell. I’m always up for a cookie.

Brian notes that the deadline for signing is December 4, so click over and sign!