The Parable of the Misguided Tea Partier

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And it came to pass in the days of the reign of Caesar Obamus that an executive order, a decree went forth that all the world was to be penalized, taxed.

A certain man, not wishing to be imprisoned, traveled the road to Jericho in order to pay his tax. He had to walk because his electric ass had caught fire and burned down his manger. His yoked oxen and cart were not green compliant (excessive bovine flatulence) so he was barred by the EPA from driving them. As he sojourned on his way, he fell among bureaucrats who robbed him, stripped him, abused him, and departed, leaving the man half dead.

Now by chance, a Democrat was motorcading down the road to attend a fundraiser and saw the disabled man and passed by on the other side. So, likewise, a civil rights spokesman traveled down that same road and he also passed by on the other side as he was in a hurry to protest racism and mistreatment in the next town.

But a Tea Partier, as he journeyed to pay his tax, came to where the man lay injured and when he saw him he had compassion. He went to him and prepared to bind up his wounds and care for him in any way he could. But as he did so several DOJ attorneys happened by. They sternly warned the man that he was not qualified, licensed, regulated, and had not paid the proper fees to lawfully care for the injured man. They instead required that he contact the proper ObamaCare offices to ask for assistance in caring for the unfortunate man. He did so, but during the 4 days it took for the Obambulance to arrive, the man had died.

As news of this tragedy reached the White Castle, Caesar Obamus held a press conference. He declared that he would not rest until these types of occurrences ceased. He vowed increased government regulation and promised to tax the rich to pay for it. He blamed the situation on his predecessor, on opposition foot-dragging, and the tsunami in Japan.

“I am your keeper, my brother.”

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