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Secession may be a joke, but…

November 15, 2012

Let’s be honest: the only people who think the “states filing petitions to secede” “story” is anything at all are: a small handful of actual wanna-be-secessionists, and the mainstream media/Democratic Party.

I betcha at least 2/3 of the people signing those petitions did so for the same reason one snaps a rolled-up towel at the wife’s rump when she bends over to pick something up. Because it’s funny, and because it’s there.

So: secession? Yawn. But:

Fact or fiction: Texas is permitted to divide itself into five states.


The 1845 Joint Resolution for Annexing Texas affirms Texas’ right to divide itself into five states if it chooses. Here’s the relevant passage, written in 19th century legalese:

“New States, of convenient size, not exceeding four in number, in addition to said State of Texas, and having sufficient population, may hereafter, by the consent of the said State, be formed out of the territory thereof, which shall be entitled to admission under the provisions of the federal constitution.”

Texas has never tested the treaty of annexation. But it is possible that ten senators could, at some point, represent the current territory of Texas. How ’bout East Texas, West Texas, Central Texas, South Texas and North Texas?

Okay, so: that’s not about to happen. Even splitting Texas into two, much less five different states. And no, you couldn’t just call one “Texas.” They’d all want to claim it.

How about “Rio,” “Alamo,” “Bowie,” “Austin” (Stephen Austin was the “Father of Texas”), and “Brown?” Or maybe “Sand?”

Oh, fine, how about “Opuntia?” That’s the prickly-pear cactus. It’s Texas’ official state plant.

Hmmm…the Alamo was near San Antonio, I guess, so you’d probably want to make sure San Antonio and the City of Austin aren’t in the same split-off. And you probably wouldn’t name one “Alamo” and one “Bowie.” Maybe an Indian name of some kind. Or, hell, just go ahead and call it “Jerryjones.” You know he won’t shut up until you do.

In the grand scheme of things, of course, it wouldn’t make that much difference. But…eight more U.S. Senators. Eight more Electoral College votes. And as we all know, Texas is one conservative place.

Hat tip Insty.

One Comment
  1. Shawn Collins permalink
    November 19, 2012 3:27 pm

    It is my understanding that Texas lost that ability when they became a “conquered territory” after the War Between the States.

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